Well, I received my first letter from Charles at BMT... Its so wonderful to see his writing and to hold something that I know he has touched over the past week... I guess it's pretty desperate when you get to that point.. haha Everyone told me it was such a great feeling to receive the post card with the address on it, but I never received that so this letter was the first thing I've received that really cemented in my mind that he's actually at BMT besides an empty bed.
Its hard to read his words when I know he's feeling so defeated. I expected that to some point, but its still hard. Charlie has always been so jovial and childlike, qualities that I absolutely love about him... So hearing him sound defeated, both in the phone call I received Monday and then in his first letter is heart wrenching. I know things will get better for him though and I know its all a process... I keep telling myself that he'll make it, he'll be that much better for it, and that things will be good for him. But when I read him write things like "I have lost sight of my main goals" it kills me.
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